My toddler’s bedtime routine takes too long – it’s exhausting me out!
Do you wake up in the morning already dreading night time? I’ve been there.
I’d look at the clock constantly and as evening approached, I’d become more and more apprehensive about getting the kids into bed.
Just the IDEA of getting through with the bedtime routine would exhaust me, tiring me out even before I’d actually started.
And then I realized it’s because the bedtime routine would stretch on and on and ON. The kids would do everything possible to keep making it stretch as long as possible.
I also realized that what I had going on wasn’t even a “routine” – it was more of a mishmash of stuff that I thought I should be doing before the kid’s bedtime but neither the kids nor me were finding it remotely peaceful.
Now I’m on the other side of the fence.
I actually look forward to my kid’s bedtime routine. And I’d like to share with you some awesome tips on everything I did to make bedtime transform from an absolute nightmare into a time of peace and calm.
So let’s go over 7 hacks that can help you create an ideal bedtime routine for your little one and how you can prevent the routine from stretching on and on and on.
This post is about what you should do when your toddler’s bedtime routine takes too long
Toddler’s bedtime routine takes too long – 7 Tips to Create an Ideal Bedtime Routine
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#1 Keep the Bedtime Routine Simple
Far too many parents make the bedtime routine into this complicated and arduous task. They do this by trying to stuff in too many activities right before bedtime.
The whole point of a bedtime routine is to let your child wind down and prepare to get into bed.
So keep it simple and more importantly, keep it short. Include those things in the routine that both you and your child enjoy doing together.
If you are trying to cram 8 different activities into your bedtime routine, you may be doing too much. Remember, babies and toddlers can quickly become over-stimulated, so if the bedtime routine is packed full of action, and if it requires you to transition between lots of different activities, your little one may actually become wound up, instead of calming down and relaxing.
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Avoid those things that you find too tiring to do at the end of a long day. If you find bathtimes exhausting, then keep that for earlier on in the day and not for night time.
Make the bedtime routine customized to what suits YOUR family and YOUR situation.
Don’t just follow the crowd. If you’re dreading carrying out the bedtime routine every night then it’s a sign that you need to alter it to suit your needs.
This has been the biggest change I’ve made to my kid’s bedtime routine and its made a world of a difference.
I’m no longer stuffing in too many activities before the kids sleep – instead I’ve opted for 3-4 activities that are relaxing for both the kids AND me.
#2 Create the Right Sleep Environment
Creating the right ambiance is key to a good bedtime routine. The idea is that you want your child to feel calm, relaxed and sleepy by the end of the routine and NOT hyper, jumpy and excited.
Adding soothing elements to your child’s routine can help create that sleepy environment.
- Dimming the lights and putting on a soothing nighttime light is a super easy and quick way to create the right ambiance. This is the turtle night light we have and the kids LOVE the gentle night sky effect with constellations that it has
- Reading story books is again something that many toddlers find soothing and comforting
- Lullabies and songs are also great – my toddler loves me singing a night time lullaby right as she gets into bed
- A white noise machine can help block out loud sounds that startle your little one awake
- Adding a humidifier to the kid’s room is something that has helped me a LOT. It keeps a child’s nasal passageways clear and prevents them from waking up in the middle of the night with a blocked nose
- Blackout blinds are an absolute must during the summer months to block out the light
Note: Having the right mattress for your child is something that many parents overlook. Yet it’s perhaps THE MOST important aspect of establishing good bedtime hygiene.
Most mattresses are filled with terrible chemicals that can cause severe long term health problems for your child.
So if you haven’t already, switch to an organic non toxic matress that is safe from all harmful chemicals.
One of the leading brands in kids non toxic mattresses is Naturepedic.
Their 2 in 1 organic crib mattress is made from the safest and healthiest materials on earth.
Best part? It has a waterproof side for potty training and a quilted side for lasting comfort. Check out naturepedics collection of organic kids mattresses, bedsheets and sheet protectors. You won’t be disappointed.
Here are some definite no nos for creating a good bedtime routine:
- Avoid screen time at least an hour before bedtime
- Don’t include entertaining and exciting things in the bedtime routine like tickles and jokes – these will lead to your toddler getting overstimulated instead of sleepy
- Avoid any electronics with loud sounds before bedtime
#3 Cut out Unnecessary Add-ons
If you’re finding that your toddler’s bedtime routine takes too long then you need to do some cutting out of activities. First, decide how long you want the routine to take. Ideally a good bedtime routine takes 10-15 minutes.
Then write down those activities that are essential. These could include changing into pjs and brushing teeth. After that, add in 1-2 activities. This could be a warm bath, a short story book, lullabies, a short night prayer, hugs and kisses.
Time yourself for a few days to ensure that the routine is within the time limit. Then make sure to be consistent with it. If it still seems too long then work on shortening it, for example instead of promising 3 stories at bedtime, stick with 1 story.
Remember: if you’re irritable and frustrated at bedtime then you’re defeating the whole point of the routine.
#4 Bedtime Routine Charts are Your Best Friend
“Let the routine be the boss so you don’t have to” This is something that I learnt from parenting expert Amy McCready when I took her parenting course “Positive Parenting Solutions”; implementing this tactic in my life has been transformative in my parenting journey.
Instead of being pushy and constantly having to remind, yell and nag our kids into doing stuff, we let the routines be the boss. So we don’t have to. It really is genius.
In terms of getting our kids to quickly do their night time stuff without a fuss, a bed time routine chart is something awesome that works for kids of all ages, particularly ages 2- 10.
Using a bedtime routine chart for both my 3 and 7 year old has helped take out so much of the stress associated with bedtime. The kids can see the chart, know exactly what they have to do and can put their pictures in the ‘done’ section when they finish a task. The chart tells them exactly what they have to do and in what order, so it saves you from all the reminding and nagging.
If you’re struggling with getting things moving along at night time and your toddler’s bedtime routine takes too long then I recommend that you check out these adorable night time routine charts that have worked wonders with my kids.
#5 Create a When-Then Routine
This is again a technique that I learnt from Amy McCready’s parenting program. A when- then routine is fairly straightforward. You tell your child that WHEN they do X, THEN they’ll get to do Y.
X can be something that they must do at night time like finish their dinner, brush teeth and get into their pjs. Y is something that they really look forward to like you reading them a story book before bed or a quiet game that you play with them before bed.
The idea is to let the kids know that only when they complete their night time responsibilities will it be possible to do the more enjoyable aspects of getting to bed.
#6 Be Prepared to Handle Delays
As with everything to do with toddlers, you do need to be prepared for the worst. Despite your best efforts, there will be days when your child will do everything they can to delay bedtime.
They’ll beg for one last story, one last hug, one last drink of water. Then they’ll pop out of bed when lights are out and say theres a monster under the bed. After that they’ll need to pee some more. Then they’ll want some more water. Another hug. One last kiss.
After an exhausting day of running after a toddler, this can be the last straw for many parents. As hard as it is, try to be patient and calm.
One thing that helps me out is to start the bedtime routine 5-10 minutes earlier. That way, if I want the kids to be in bed by 7: 30, I finish off the routine and tucking in by 7: 20; so 10 minutes of the kids asking for extra favors makes me less cranky and frustrated because I’ve already factored in that time.
#7 Consistency is Everything
“Your bedtime routine may change over time, as your child gets older, but it should be fairly consistent from day to day, starting at the same time and going in the same order.”Verywellfamily
Establishing a good bedtime routine requires consistency. Without it, your toddler won’t be able to develop good sleep habits. Try to start and end the bedtime routine at roughly the same time every day. Also, keep the order of the activities the same each night. This helps your toddler get into a routine and know what comes next.
FAQs
How long should a toddler bedtime routine take?
An ideal toddler bedtime routine should take about 10 – 15 minutes. If you include a bath in the routine then it can take slightly longer. The goal is to have your child feel drowsy by the end of the routine.
Why does my toddler take so long to go to bed?
Naps that are too short or too long are a big culprit in causing your toddler to take ages to go to bed. Inconsistent bedtime routines are another culprit.
How do I stop my toddler from bedtime stalling?
Night time charts are a great way to avoid bedtime stalling as they motivate kids to quickly get done with their night time routine. Having an established night time routine is also key. Promising kids an extra story or song once they hop into bed can be another way to motivate kids to get into bed without stalling.
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This post was about what you should do when your toddler’s bedtime routine takes too long
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